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1.慎用美式英语中一些含有否定意义的词汇

Be careful of using wors that have a negative meaning in American English. The wor “propagana,” for example,means something like “government-controlle brainwashing” in the US. (Your best choice is to use the wors “marketing” or“publicity” if you want to inicate that you organize a campaign to raise awareness of a certain problem.)

Likewise,in the US we o not use the wors“cripple” an “retare”; we use “hanicappe” (or even better,“isable”) an“evelopmentally isable” or “mentally challenge.” We on’t call ol people“ol people”—we call them “elers” or “the elerly.” An we prefer “businessperson” or “business professional” to “businessman.”

慎用美式英语中一些含有否定意义的词汇。例如，“propagana”这个词在美国就有点“政府洗脑式”的宣传的意思了。（如果你想要表达你发起一项运动来提高人们对于某一问题的认识的话，最好选用“marketing”或是“publicity”。）

同样的，在美国，也不会用“cripple”或者是“retare”之类的词，取而代之的是“hanicappe”（isable更好）以及“evelopmentally isable”或“mentally isable”。我们在称呼老人时也不直接用“ol people”，而是用“elers”或是“the elerly”。我们也不经常用“businessman”，而是用“businessperson”或“business professional ”。

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2.变换句子的长短

Vary the length of the sentences in your essay. If you have written several long sentences in a row,insert a short sentence to give the reaer a break. Variety in your sentences will make your essay easier to rea (an thus more memorable).

It also emonstrates that you have a superior comman of the English language. An on’t be afrai of incluing a one-sentence paragraph. Aone-sentence paragraph (especially at the beginning or en of your essay) will be very ramatic an grab the reaer’s attention.

变换句子的长短。如果你已经连续用了几个长句，那么插入一个短句能给读者一个停顿的时间。句式多样化能够使你的短文更容易懂，因而也更容易让人记住。这样的句式变换也证明你的英语语言掌握的比较好。同时不要害怕运用一句式段落。一句式段落，（尤其是在短文的开头结尾）会很出彩，也会吸引读者的注意力。

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3.不要试图费力地运用一些特别长的句子或者特别大的词汇

If English is your secon language,on’t try to make it har on yourself by writing really long sentences an using large vocabulary wors. (Don’t say “internationalization”; just say“international.”

Why use “metropolis” when you can just use “city”?) Remember that the reaers are not hoping to be impresse by your vocabulary—they want tobe impresse by your story.

如果英语是你的第二语言，那么不要试图费力地运用一些特别长的句子或者特别大的词汇。（不要用“internationalization”，用“international”就好了。另外，如果你可以用“city”，为什么要用“metropolis”呢？）记住，读者并不希望被你的词汇打动，而是被你的故事所打动。

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4.对自己研究过的项目进行详细说明

If you are applying to grauate school,your personal statement will nee to inclue etaile evience of your research. For example,if you are applying toa grauate program in biology,your PS shoul inclue specific escriptions of experiences you have ha,such as research projects,internships,work in biological laboratories,an such.

The other key elements for grauate stuy applications are what you want to stuy,the fiel you are intereste in,the backgroun you have,why you have chosen this particular program,an your plans after grauation.

如果你正在申请研究生院校，那么你的个人简历就需要包括你研究项目的一些详细的说明。例如，如果你正在申请生物专业的研究生项目，那么你的个人简历就需要对你的研究经历进行详细的描述，比如你的研究项目，实习经历，以及在生物实验这方面的工作等等。研究生学习申请的其他的一些关键因素还包括：你想要研究什么，你对哪一个领域感兴趣，你的个人背景，选择这一研究项目的原因以及毕业后的打算。

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5.避免运用一些不恰当的理由

Avoi using inappropriate reasons for why a particular college is attractive to you. (I have actually seen essays where the applicant escribe how much he “love” the University of Chicago an wante to ate her,an another where the applicant wrote that NYU was attractive because she just love the color purple on theNYU website.) You must rea the website carefully to iscover specific programs,activities,curricula,istinguishe professors (an the like) that you can point to an say,“THIS is why I want to go to University X.”

在说明某所大学为何对你有吸引力时，避免运用一些不恰当的理由。（曾经看过申请者在短文中描述自己是如何如何热爱芝加哥大学，并想要和它约会的，而另一个人则在短文中说纽约大学吸引她仅仅是因为她喜欢纽约大学网站上的紫色）。

你必须仔细浏览学校官方网站，以便发现一些具体的项目、活动、课程，以及著名的教授，诸如此类的，然后你就可以在短文中指出这就是你想要去XX大学的原因。

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6.不要只在短文中陈述学校多么好

Do not tell the school how goo it is. “I want to atten the prestigiousUniversity X because it is a top US college with an international reputation,”just souns insincere.

不要只在短文中陈述学校多么好。“我想要申请著名的XX大学，因为它是美国一所顶尖的大学，在国际上都享有盛誉。”这样说的话会显得不真诚。

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7.吸引读者的眼球

Catch the reaer’s attention in the first sentence of your essay by writing something ramatic or humorous. In one excellent essay I rea,the applicant (hoping to major in entomology),wrote this: “Ahhhh! There are bugs in the shampoo!‘Doesn’t that make you want to rea more? (He then went on to escribe how his mother ha foun one of his “science experiments” involving insects,an how experiences like this mae him want to stuy entomology.)

在短文的开头写一些富有戏剧性的或者是幽默的东西，以吸引读者的眼球。曾有一篇优秀的短文，申请人想要修昆虫学专业，开头他是这样写的：“啊，洗发露里竟然有虫子！读完，难道你不会想要继续读下去吗？（接下来他又描述了他的母亲如何发现了他的一次昆虫“科学实验”，以及这些经历是怎样使他最终想要研究昆虫学的。）

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8.首尾呼应

If you start with a story,you can en with some reference to the same story. (Our entomology stuent,for example,coul then mention his mother’s shock again in his last paragraph.)

如果你是以一个故事开头的，那么你可以在结尾的时候再提一下这个故事，所谓“点题”（例如，这位昆虫学的学生在最后一段再次提到他的母亲对他这些行为有多震惊。）

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9.恰当的引用能够大大增强文章的可信度。

Well-chosen quotations can a powerful creibility to your essay. All you nee to o is ecie what the key concept of your essay is (such as strength,honor,or patience)an then use the internet to fin quotations that use any of these keywors.The best quotations come from persons who are well-known to both Chinese anAmerican reaers,an they must be amirable persons. (Past American anChinese presients are goo examples.) The quote shoul be short,about one powerful sentence in length. Incluing a striking quotation in your essay is particularly persuasive if you are applying to a humanities program or want to be an English major,as it emonstrates the breath of your reaing.

恰当的引用能够大大增强文章的可信度。而你需要做的就是选定你的文章所要表达的关键点，（比如说个人特长，获得的荣誉，或者是参加的实践活动等等），然后再根据这些关键词在网上搜索有关这方面的引文。

最好的引文是出自那些在中国和美国读者中都比较有名并且令人敬佩的人。（前任美国总统，中国主席这些都是比较好的例子。）引文最好简短有力，大概一句那么长。如果你想要申请人文学科项目或者是想要学英语专业，那么这样漂亮的引文会使文章非常有说服力的，因为这样的引用可以证明你阅读广泛。

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10.突出自己的个性

Your purpose in writing your essay is to come across as a unique iniviual,one who stans out from all the other applicants an one whose writing style is lively,fresh,an ifferent. For unergrauate essays,the personal etails of your life an the struggles you have ha to overcome will make goo stories. Goo stories are memorable. You on’t have to be a perfect person; inee,it may be that any “flaws” you have will convince the reaer that you are a muti-facete person who learns from your mistakes. These flaws on’t have to be terrible:You can escribe the time that you mae complete a fool of yourself before your friens. (Americans call this the “My most embarrassing moment” essay.) Then tell the reaer what you learne from this experience.

你的写作目的是为了突出你是一个独特的个体，一个在众多申请者中脱颖而出的人，而你的写作风格也应是生动活泼，新颖清新，与众不同的。对于本科生的文书写作来说，你的个人的生活经历以及奋斗历程都会成为比较好的故事素材。好的故事一定是令人印象深刻的。当然你不必是一个非常完美的人，相反恰恰是这些缺点会使读者相信你是多面的，你是能够从错误中吸取教训的。这些缺点不必是一些特别严重的：你可以描述你在朋友面前出糗的一次经历（美国称这类的文章为“我最尴尬时刻”类文章）。然后再告诉读者你从这次经历中学到了什么。

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11.尽可能使你的文章具体一些

Always try to make your writing as “concrete” as possible,meaning that you provie specific examples (or stories) to support your main points. Instea of just writing,for example,“I spent two months oing chemistry research,” escribe the nature of that research,what process you use,an what it taught you. Depth is more important than breath.

The reaer will be more impresse by specific etails about ONE of your experiences then a list of twenty experiences. (Save the list of experiences for your resume.)

尽可能使你的文章具体一些，这就意味着你要提供一些具体的事例或故事来支撑你的主要观点。例如，不要只是写“我做过两个月的化学研究”，而是应该详细地描述一下这次研究的性质，采用的方法，以及你收获了什么。文章的深度比广度更重要。比起罗列一堆你的个人经历，你的某一次经历中的一些细节更能打动读者（你可以把这些经历用在简历上）。

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12.陈述你的宗教信仰也是完全可以的

It is perfectly all right to escribe your particular religion in an unergrauate essay. Reaers in the US come from many ifferent religious backgrouns an the amission officers will most likely be broa-mine an tolerant. The main thing is not to try an “convert” the reaer—you simply want to show how being a Buhist (or a Catholic,or a Christian,or whatever) has ha a profoun impact on your life.

文书中陈述你的宗教信仰也是完全可以的。美国读者大都来自不同的宗教背景并且学校招生人员也都是心胸比较宽广的人。但不必试图改变读者的宗教信仰，你只需说明作为一名佛教徒（或者是天主教徒、基督徒等等）给你带来了怎样重大的影响。

【微语】你踏上异国的土地,追逐梦想的翅膀,愿风总是顺着你的方向,让每一步都充满力量。